Then & Now

When I was younger, I used to believe that I didn’t want to be like my mom. The stay at home mom/domesticated house wife story was way over rated and I didn’t ever see myself settling in to a pattern like the one I was raised in.

But then, I grew up. And the next thing I knew I started to feel like I wanted that more and more. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not your average mom by any means, and definitely not by my own mother’s standards. But, I am a good mom. I may only cook breakfast on the weekends, I drink more than I should at dinner parties, and I enjoy my ALONE time. Nonetheless, these are minor details in the grand scheme of what really matters. I kiss my kids whenever I feel like it,  I tell them stories of when I was younger and ensure them that they will not make the same mistakes I once did and I help them to see that although we may not be like everyone else, we are perfect for what we are, a family.

 I am a successful career woman. I have a career that I love, which makes it even easier to be successful at it. I have 2 beautiful children, a nice home in a good school district and guess what? I’m single. Not such a big surprise is it? I don’t mind it, I actually enjoy being single. You don’t have to answer to anyone but yourself when you get home, you don’t have to cook dinner if you don’t want to (and I don’t) and you never have to worry about the toilet seat being left up, (unless of course my 4 year old boy uses mommy’s potty.) But just recently, I felt like I was missing something… LOVE. It’s true, I have given it a shot a time or two, (they have different fathers but who’s counting), it just never really worked out. I don’t regret the decisions I have made, I just question them. I believe that as a woman of 28, I should know better than to dive head first into a pool with no water… or do I? I recently started dating someone. And when I say recent I mean 2 months ago recent. I have “known” him for a very long time, but haven’t seen or talked to him in over a decade…

 He moved in last Monday. : )

I know what you’re thinking. What in the hell is wrong with this girl? She has two kids out of wedlock already (did I mention I never married either of their father’s?) She just got out of a 7 month relationship, (probably failed to mention that one too, didn’t I?) And now she just let someone whom she has been dating for 2 months move in with her and her children??! I know, I know, its crazy, but you know what, for the first time in my life I am doing what I want to do without listening to what everyone else around me has to say, and it feels soooo unbelievably exhilarating!

I wrote this exactly 2 years ago this month... SO much has changed... stay tuned